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关系情报局 2 Relationship

关系情报局 2 Relationship

谈感情,我们是认真的。Dating App已经变成现代人寻找亲密关系的必经之路,这档栏目会和你一起探索陌生人Dating之旅,以及从Dating走向亲密关系的方方面面。

PublishesTwice weeklyEpisodes4Founded3 months ago
Language
ZH-CN
Categories
LeisureHealth & Fitness

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Artwork for 关系情报局 2 Relationship

Latest Episodes

00:02:21 从“完美人设”到真正接纳自己

• 曾经的完美阶段:28岁时事业顺利、婚姻幸福,自认为一切美满。

• 对“不完美”的无感:在完美状态中无法理解“接纳不完美”的意义。

• 人生转折:婚姻破裂与试用期被辞双重打击,彻底击碎“职场精英”“好伴侣”的人设。

• 价值感的崩塌:失去职业与情感角色带来的价值感,使自己陷入深度不快乐。

• 从失去中觉醒:正是那段“失去一切”的经历,让自己学会了真正的接纳。

00:03:41 从“如果当时我能……”到“我已经做到了最好” more

00:00:36 卢远也是回避型

判断回避型的两个直观信号

• 父母离婚者,大概率是回避型。

• 上学时期长期住校者,也大概率是回避型。

熟悉感的陷阱:为什么她会爱上“同类”

• 卢远爱上王乐晨,是因为他让她想起父亲。

• 并不是所有人都渴望幸福,很多人只是延续熟悉的伤痛模式。

• 很多人情路坎坷,是因为他们爱的不是新人,而是旧伤的影子。

住校经历与回避型的形成

• 住校的两种截然不同情形:

(正向)父母虽然让孩子住校,但经常探望、保持连接。→培养独立与信任... more

00:01:07 乐晨拒绝表达情绪的伴侣

一、乐晨的情绪困境与成长根源

乐晨对情绪表达的排斥:他很难接受伴侣向他表达情绪,当别人有情绪时,他会产生强烈的身体反应(胃部紧张)。

原因在于成长经历:他从小缺乏情绪被接纳的经验,因此学会压抑情绪,也只容许同样压抑情绪的伴侣。

心理机制:

“我能憋着,你也该憋着”——追求情绪压抑的“公平”;

“我没被接纳过情绪,所以我也不会接纳别人”;

没有接受过善意的人,也难以给予善意。

二、情绪接纳与关系成长

人的成长依赖于关系:只有当别人接纳我们... more

00:01:55 多多表达情绪,乐晨咽口水,猜测是强烈的情绪反应,表示他难以接受别人向自己表达情绪

咽口水有时候会代表人的胃部的反应,有可能是强烈的情绪反应。

就除了大脑之外,胃是第二个情绪器官。

00:03:10 乐晨认为的情绪稳定,是“压抑自己的情绪”、“自我处理自己的情绪”。

“我的情绪都是我憋着,那你怎么能不憋着?”

“我在成长过程中表达情绪是无人接纳,那我也不愿意接纳别人的情绪。”

“人只有接受到了别人的善意,他才能成长到最终去给予别人这种善意。

00:06:17 沉默,... more

00:01:39 Dating App 非常物化人类,每个人好像商品啊!

线下的、真实的、轻松愉快的去认识人的相亲方式,是否还存在?

对亲密关系的期待越来越高、社交圈越来越小,这其中的巨大矛盾,导致Dating App将是现代人不得不面对的一种新的择偶方式。

00:07:26 在Dating App上被筛选很正常,我也有我的诉求。 当对方明确自己的诉求,反倒是一种好事。

对于明确的结婚生娃需求,男生就是会选择漂亮的(因为意味着健康),女生就是会选择有资源的伴侣(因为意味着孕期可以得到安稳... more

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