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Artwork for Just Break Up: Relationship Advice from Your Queer Besties

Just Break Up: Relationship Advice from Your Queer Besties

Sierra DeMulder and Sam Blackwell
Relationships
Mental Health
Relationship Advice
Grief
Love
Boundaries
Communication In Relationships
Friendship
Family Dynamics
Jealousy
Breakups
Therapy
Parenting
Infidelity
Intimacy
Breakup
Dating
Communication
Cheating
Queer Relationships

Sam & Sierra may not be therapists, but they will tell it to you straight (even if they aren’t). Each episode, they answer listeners’ questions with compassion, radical honesty, and all the relationship advice you don’t want—but definitely need. And no, it’s not always “just break up.” (Unless you really should!)

PublishesDailyEpisodes811Founded8 years ago
Number of ListenersCategories
Mental HealthHealth & Fitness

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Artwork for Just Break Up: Relationship Advice from Your Queer Besties

Latest Episodes

Sam and Sierra answer a letter from someone who just can't imagine a life without their ex

Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, monthly office hours, and more!

SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com

FACEBOOK: /justbreakuppod

INSTAGRAM: @justbreaku... more

Sam and Sierra answer a letter from someone who wants to thank the man who kept her safe ten years ago

Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, monthly office hours, and more!

SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com

FACEBOOK: /justbreakuppod

INSTAGRAM:... more

In this Patreon episode we're releasing on the main feed, Sam and Sierra answer a letter from someone who is feeling renewed shame about something terrible that happened to her and her friend

Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, monthly o... more

Sam and Sierra answer a letter from someone who is having trouble sticking to her relationship when her father is dying

Join us on Patreon for an extra weekly episode, monthly office hours, and more!

SUBMIT: justbreakuppod.com

FACEBOOK: /justbreak... more

Key Facts

Accepts Sponsors
Contact Information
Podcast Host
Number of Listeners
Find out how many people listen to this podcast per episode and each month.

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People also subscribe to these shows.

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Recent Guests

Nick the Conflicted
Listener who submitted the letter
Listener of the show
Episode: Episode 771: My Ex's Mom Texted Me to Get Her Gifts Back
Shy Guy
Letter writer who identifies as they/them
Episode: Episode 765: Advice For a Newly Single Baby Gay Pollywog
Polly Jones
Letter writer sharing personal story
England-based listener
Episode: Episode 761: My Fiancé's Moving Out, My Girlfriend's Moving In
Instant Wife and Mother
Letter writer featured in the episode
Episode: Episode 754: How Do I Enjoy This Beautiful, Hard Life?
Twice Fooled Fool
Listener letter writer from Heartbreak Time Loop
Audience member
Episode: Episode 735: Evicting an Ex From Your Mind
Rocky Hoare
Listener who wrote in seeking guidance; pronouns she/her and they/them
Episode: Episode 717: I Bad About Self-Soothing With Casual Sex
Miss Fix It
Letter writer seeking relationship advice
Episode: Episode 704: Can Healing Drown Out Instinct?

Hosts

Sierra DeMolder
Host of the show; long-time relationship advice contributor with a focus on compassionate candor.
Sam Blackwell
Co-host providing direct, thoughtful relationship coaching and practical guidance.

Reviews

4.9 out of 5 stars from 3.4k ratings
  • Queer Inner Circle

    The truth is I can’t remember when I started listening. Perhaps like a year and a half in, let’s say right before COVID? Wow, we still measure time based on a pandemic.

    Yes, this is the world we live in. And yet, since that time, somehow, someway, you two have continued to let us glimpse into your friendship and learn from your wisdom, so supportively and graciously given to listeners. For so many YEARS…because what is time?

    I don’t often leave long reviews, but I consider you all are a MAJOR ... more

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    SetLover
    United States2 months ago
  • Awesome !

    I am a new listener , and absolutely love these two. They are very kind and compassionate, and give incredible insight and advice ! So thankful I found them at this point in my life 💞

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    hgdsyiobdst
    Canada4 months ago
  • Lifesaver

    I have listened to JBU for years now and I truly cannot thank these two enough for the wisdom and comfort they have provided me though good and the bad times. It’s been so therapeutic, often way more helpful than my IRL therapy sessions. I appreciate their thoughtful, empathetic, deeply helpful perspectives and insights. It’s so refreshing and I just love listening to these two so much. Thank you for sharing your energy, time, and gift with us. You make this world a better place.

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    mdubbbb88
    United States5 months ago
  • Life saving advice

    I’ve been listening to this podcast since the very first minute it aired and it has been soothing me through some of the hardest times in my life. I love you guys with all my heart, it’s been a privilege to listen along while you sort through everybody’s mess, including your own, with so much care and wisdom. ♥️♥️♥️

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    n.shirin
    Germany7 months ago
  • Like very insightful friends

    Listening to this podcast has genuinely helped me think more securely about relationships and I recommend it often to friends. The hosts are imperfect people who have been on their own path of emotional growth and security. They do a great job of pulling from their own experiences and personal research to give the best advice they know how to give. Their candor and vulnerability is so genuine and refreshing. Listening to this podcast is like listening to two very insightful friends work through ... more

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Lfdeshane
    United States7 months ago

Listeners Say

Key themes from listener reviews, highlighting what works and what could be improved about the show.

Some critiques note a tendency toward optimism and non-therapist framing.
Overall, listeners praise the hosts for empathy and practical advice.
Fans appreciate the candid, supportive tone and real-life coaching.

Chart Rankings

How this podcast ranks in the Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube charts.

Talking Points

Recent interactions between the hosts and their guests.

Episode 777: Grateful For One Safe Man When So Many Aren't
Q: Should I reach out and tell him how grateful I am? Would you?
The hosts encourage her to send a message describing how his care made her feel safe and how much the memory has stayed with her. They note that expressing gratitude can be meaningful for her without turning the message into praise for behavior that should be ordinary.
Episode 778: There Is A Future Without This Love
Q: How do I trust myself again after this experience?
The hosts say the writer's love and trust did not cause the heartbreak; relationships can end despite good intentions, and she can learn from the experience without blaming herself. They encourage her to accept that she may never understand the breakup, prioritize her own care, and seek support.
Episode 771: My Ex's Mom Texted Me to Get Her Gifts Back
Q: What should Nick do about the gifts and sentimental items now that the relationship has ended?
Set clear limits: decide which items you truly want or need, propose a concrete plan (e.g., specific items to return or donate), and avoid ambiguous commitments; treat the process as a boundary-setting exercise rather than an emotional obligation.
Episode 760: Got Married, Got a Visa, Got Chlamydia
Q: Do you want this life with him?
The hosts push for an honest assessment of whether the writer truly wants to stay in the relationship beyond immigration needs, emphasizing that love and safety must align for a healthy future.
Episode 743: The Line Between Compassion and Self-Abandonment
Q: How do you know the difference between compromising on your own sense of self and being empathetic to others, and can two people with different emotional styles sustain a deeply meaningful relationship?
The hosts suggest thinking in terms of adjustable lenses or gels—empathy and self-care can both be present, but you must calibrate them to protect your own boundaries. If the other person doesn't meet you halfway or if you have to perform to maintain the relationship, it may be a sign to re-evaluate and possibly redefine the relationship's shape.

Audience Metrics

Listeners, social reach, demographics and more for this podcast.

Listeners per Episode
Gender Skew
Location
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Frequently Asked Questions About This Podcast

What is This Podcast about and what kind of topics does it cover?

Two hosts deliver relationship guidance with warmth and candor, focusing on breakups, attachment patterns, communication, boundaries, and self-growth. Episodes blend empathetic coaching with humor, pop culture references, and practical scripts, often addressing LGBTQ+ relationship dynamics and everyday life transitions. A notable strength is their direct, non-judgmental approach paired with sensitivity, making complex feelings feel manageable for listeners navigating breakups or securing healthier patterns. The format routinely normalizes therapy-like introspection without claiming professional credentials, and sponsorships are woven in a light, human-centered way that keeps the conversations approachable and supportive for a broad audience... more

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Which podcasts are similar to this podcast?

These podcasts share a similar audience with this podcast:

1. The Psychology of Relationships
2. Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel
3. On Attachment
4. Two Dykes And A Mic
5. Dating Intentionally

How many episodes of this podcast are there?

this podcast launched 8 years ago and published 811 episodes to date. You can find more information about this podcast including rankings, audience demographics and engagement in our podcast database.

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What guests have appeared on this podcast?

Recent guests on this podcast include:

1. Nick the Conflicted
2. Shy Guy
3. Polly Jones
4. Instant Wife and Mother
5. Twice Fooled Fool
6. Rocky Hoare
7. Miss Fix It

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