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Artwork for Playing With Fire

Playing With Fire

Joli Hamilton
Non-Monogamy
Polyamory
Relationships
Jealousy
Personal Growth
Communication
Individuation
Relationship Dynamics
Attachment Theory
Intimacy
Compersion
Shadow Work
Conflict Resolution
Emotional Regulation
Community Support
Consensual Non-Monogamy
Envy
Monogamy
New Relationship Energy
Power Dynamics

Welcome to Playing With Fire, the podcast for people who are ready to custom-build their love. We’re talking about non-monogamy–however you design it–as an individuation opportunity. Want to leave the default and make your life spectacularly you? You’re in the right place.

PublishesWeeklyEpisodes250Founded6 years ago
Number of ListenersCategories
RelationshipsSociety & Culture

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Artwork for Playing With Fire

Latest Episodes

The phrase "we opened up too fast" comes up a lot in the conversations we have with people who are transitioning from monogamy to non-monogamy. But what does "too fast" even mean? And more importantly—too fast for whom?

Here's the thing: once you've... more

Regular relationship check-ins might sound boring (maybe even like homework), but here's the thing: they're not just maintenance, they're the architecture that holds everything together. Most people either skip them entirely, do them inconsistently, ... more

You decided to practice conscious non-monogamous relating, so you made well-thought-out, enthusiastic relationship agreements that reflect your values. And THEN, your partner actually goes on that date. Panic sets in, and those agreements are no matc... more

Ever wonder why you and your partner keep having the same frustrating conversations about decisions, even after you've gone through the agreement-making process? Us too! We've discovered that the real issue often isn't what you're deciding, it's that... more

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Recent Guests

Mel Cassidy
Somatic relationship coach focused on non-monogamy and intimacy.
Author of 'Radical Relating'
Episode: 239 Radical Relating with Mel Cassidy
Jessica Fern
Psychotherapist, certified clinical trauma professional, and author of PolySecure and PolySecure Workbook
Episode: 227 Transforming Shame into Love with Jessica Fern and David Cooley
David Cooley
Professional restorative justice facilitator
Episode: 227 Transforming Shame into Love with Jessica Fern and David Cooley
Lauren Elise Rogers
Certified holistic sexuality educator and embodied intimacy and relationship coach
None
Episode: 223 Recovering From Purity Culture with Lauren Elise Barnes
Marla Schreiber
A white, queer, gender-defiant therapist and advocate for non-monogamous relationships.
Episode: 214 Defying Mononormativity with @Polyamarla
Dr. Nicole Thompson
Queer, non-monogamous sex and relationship psychotherapist with training in psychedelic integration therapy, founder of The Pleasure Practice.
Modern Anarchy Podcast
Episode: 213 Psychedelics and Non-Monogamy with Dr. Nicole Thompson
Annie Undone
Non-binary queer writer and advocate for relationship anarchy
Episode: 208 Relationship Anarchy: Tailor-Making ALL Your Relationships with Annie Undone
Mollena Lee Williams-Haas
Multi-hyphenate wonder, storyteller, writer, performer, kink educator, and activist.
Kink Doula
Episode: 192 [Replay] What would you do with your full power? A conversation about kink, power exchange, and everyday life with Mollena Williams-Haas
Sunny Megatron
Award-winning clinical sexologist, BDSM and sexuality educator, and media personality.
Showtime, American Sex Podcast, Deeply Open, Open Deeply Podcast
Episode: 191 [Replay] Turn your Toxic Attractions into Psychological Growth with Sunny Megatron

Hosts

Jolie Hamilton
Primary host and expert in relational psychology; associated with the Year Of Opening program and relationship education.
Ken
Co-host known for practical relationship strategies and candid dialogues.

Reviews

4.8 out of 5 stars from 158 ratings
  • Excellent

    Great containers

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    lovealways#
    United Kingdoma month ago
  • Good

    Good your containers are capable of being connected

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    lovealways#
    United Kingdom5 months ago
  • Great if there were non-mono people out there

    Another overhyped podcast about topics that apply to people who don’t actually exist or are impossible to find.

    Apple Podcasts
    1
    K9 fan
    United States7 months ago
  • My favorite podcast!

    Honestly this podcast is fabulous for ENM but also ANY relationship. I love the dialogue, education and the deep dives. I find myself constantly digging deeper and learning more every episode. Thank you for making this podcast!!

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Miss Lissa1
    United States2 years ago
  • Awesome!

    Great! But Ken’s name is missing from the title image of this podcast. Having you two there, Juli and Ken, makes a big difference so I’d love to see his name on the title!

    Awesome job, guys!

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Katharina0312
    United States2 years ago

Listeners Say

Key themes from listener reviews, highlighting what works and what could be improved about the show.

Many appreciate actionable strategies and frameworks for real-life relationship work.
Listeners praise the show for honest, vulnerable conversations that feel authentic and applicable.
A few reviews note a desire for broader representation or more guest diversity, but overall positive reception.

Chart Rankings

How this podcast ranks in the Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube charts.

Talking Points

Recent interactions between the hosts and their guests.

[Replay] 222 The Greater the Tension, the Greater the Potential: Individuating in Relationships
Q: Great, what's the question?
The listener asks how to work with deep inner conflict in non-monogamy without shutting down or abandoning themselves, seeking a depth-psychological approach.
241 Betrayal & Non-Monogamy with Eve Rickert
Q: What is the role of self-trust after a betrayal?
Repair starts with rebuilding trust in oneself—understanding when you were acting with agency, recognizing your blind spots, and learning to read situations more clearly before moving forward.
241 Betrayal & Non-Monogamy with Eve Rickert
Q: How do you define betrayal beyond a broken agreement?
Betrayal is a violation of trust with stakes that shake your sense of safety and reality, often requiring repair not just between two people but across the relational ecosystem.
223 Recovering From Purity Culture with Lauren Elise Barnes
Q: What would you say to somebody just beginning to question their upbringing around purity and sexuality?
I'd invite them to do a little exercise: think of yourself at the following ages—seven, fourteen, and twenty-one—and answer questions about sex, relationships, and pleasure to see how your beliefs have evolved.
223 Recovering From Purity Culture with Lauren Elise Barnes
Q: What is purity culture? What does it mean?
Purity culture is defined as the belief that one's worth and value are attached to sexual purity, often characterized by expectations to remain abstinent until marriage and the framing of gender roles in relationships.

Audience Metrics

Listeners, social reach, demographics and more for this podcast.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Playing With Fire

What is Playing With Fire about and what kind of topics does it cover?

The series centers on intentional, non-traditional relationship design, offering frameworks, practical tools, and candid conversations about negotiation, consent, and autonomy within intimate, family, and business partnerships. Episodes frequently explore decision-making, betrayal repair, jealousy, and personal growth through Jungian psychology, shadow work, and the Year Of Opening program. A standout aspect is the blend of scholarly insight with real-life anecdotes, aiming to normalize nuanced relationship dynamics and empower listeners to define intimacy on their own terms.

Listeners likely value depth, honesty, and actionable strategies for building connected, ethical partnerships. The show stands out for its collaborative vibe between ... more

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Which podcasts are similar to Playing With Fire?

These podcasts share a similar audience with Playing With Fire:

1. Multiamory: Rethinking Modern Relationships
2. Sex and Psychology Podcast
3. Sexology
4. Sex With Emily
5. Savage Lovecast

How many episodes of Playing With Fire are there?

Playing With Fire launched 6 years ago and published 250 episodes to date. You can find more information about this podcast including rankings, audience demographics and engagement in our podcast database.

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What guests have appeared on Playing With Fire?

Recent guests on Playing With Fire include:

1. Mel Cassidy
2. Jessica Fern
3. David Cooley
4. Lauren Elise Rogers
5. Marla Schreiber
6. Dr. Nicole Thompson
7. Annie Undone
8. Mollena Lee Williams-Haas

To view more recent guests and their details, simply upgrade your Rephonic account. You'll also get access to a typical guest profile to help you decide if the show is worth pitching.

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