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Artwork for Relationship Renovation: Why Couples Get Stuck & How They Find Their Way Back

Relationship Renovation: Why Couples Get Stuck & How They Find Their Way Back

EJ and Tarah Kerwin
Emotional Safety
Relationships
Intimacy
Communication
Couples Therapy
Emotional Connection
Conflict Resolution
Communication Skills
Mental Health
Attachment Theory
Parenting
Emotional Intimacy
Relationship Renovation
Therapy
Relationship Dynamics
Anxiety
Personal Growth
Physical Intimacy
Couples Counseling
Marriage

You love each other. So why does the same fight keep happening?

Married therapists Tarah and EJ Kerwin help couples understand the patterns behind recurring arguments, emotional distance, and struggles with intimacy—and explore how to respond differently.

Drawing on their own marriage, their work with couples, and relationship science, they bring honest conversations and practical tools to communi... more

PublishesTwice weeklyEpisodes308Founded8 years ago
Number of ListenersCategories
RelationshipsHealth & FitnessMental HealthSociety & Culture

Listen to this Podcast

Artwork for Relationship Renovation: Why Couples Get Stuck & How They Find Their Way Back

Latest Episodes

What if the way you protect yourself during conflict is actually pushing your partner away? In this episode, EJ and Tarah Kerwin explore how childhood experiences shape our reactions in adult relationships, why old coping strategies can create emotio... more

YouTube

What if anxiety isn't the enemy, but your body's way of telling you something needs attention? In this episode, EJ and Tarah sit down with Dr. Nicole Cain, author of Panic Proof, to explore how anxiety affects relationships, why it can show up as ang... more

YouTube

What happens when you finally make time for each other, only to walk away feeling more disconnected than before? In this episode, EJ and Tarah Kerwin share a date night that went sideways and explore how unspoken expectations and different emotional ... more

What if real strength isn't about having everything figured out, but about being honest, accountable, and willing to grow? In this episode, Tarah sits down with EJ Kerwin to explore the heart behind Men Who Do the Work, a community helping men build ... more

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Recent Guests

Nicole Cain
Licensed naturopathic doctor, mental health expert, and author of Panic Proof
Episode: Anxiety Isn't the Enemy: What Your Body Is Trying to Tell You
Brooke Bralove
Psychotherapist, certified sex therapist, and trauma specialist with more than 20 years of experience.
Episode: The Desire Gap: Rebuilding Intimacy Without Pressure
EJ Kerwin
Guest on the show; co-host in this episode's context
Relationship Renovation
Episode: Why Everything Feels Like Your Responsibility (The Hidden Belief That Was Quietly Running My Life)
Dr. Lee Baucom
Creator of the Save the Marriage System; nationally recognized expert in relationship resilience and marital recovery
Save the Marriage System; Save the Marriage Podcast
Episode: What If You're The Only One Trying To Save The Relationship? (Interview with Dr. Lee Baucom)
Dr. Ariana Sholes-Douglas
Founder and Medical Director of Tula Wellness; expert on menopause and perimenopause
Tula Wellness
Episode: Perimenopause, Intimacy & Relationships: What Couples Need To Understand (Part 2) | Dr. Arianna Sholes-Douglas
Arianna Sholes-Douglas
Medical doctor and menopause expert, founder and medical director at Tula Wellness
Tula Wellness (Tula Wellness and Aesthetics)
Episode: Perimenopause, Brain Fog & Relationship Strain: What Every Woman (and Man) Needs to Know (Part 1)
Dr. Dan Peters
Psychologist, host of Make It a Great One Podcast
Make It a Great One
Episode: The Shift That Changes Everything in Your Relationship (And Yourself) with Dr. Dan Peters
Dr. Stan Tatkin
Co-founder of the PACT Institute; renowned relationship expert
PACT Institute
Episode: Betrayal, Infidelity & Trust: Dr. Stan Tatkin on Why Relationships Fail (and How to Repair Them)
Dr. Maria Sophocles
Board certified gynecologist, national menopause expert, medical director of Women's Healthcare of Princeton
Women's Healthcare of Princeton
Episode: Why Sex Changes in Midlife and How Couples Close the Bedroom Gap

Hosts

Tarah Kerwin
Married therapist and relationship coach focused on communication, emotional safety, and connection.
EJ Kerwin
Licensed professional counselor and couples coach; founder of Men Who Do the Work.

Reviews

4.8 out of 5 stars from 303 ratings
  • All the tools you need to have a great relationship!

    At 40 years of marriage I can only say it would have been a vastly different 40 years if we had the skills we learned from Tarah and EJ from the start. I highly recommend their at home course for all couples before marriage. If your partner is not willing or interested in doing it - I would say that is a good sign of what is ahead for your relationship. Good relationships start with love and attraction but are built and grow with the skills taught here. Don’t wait until you need them to save a... more

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Dedm56
    United Statesa month ago
  • Excellent

    I would highly recommend for anyone looking to improve their relationship. Podcasts are insightful, educational, and relatable. They also provide a wealth of knowledge to be gained.

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    B_RealMadrid
    United States3 months ago
  • The support your marriage needs!

    You don’t have to feel like you’re a team on your own. EJ and Tarah are helping partnerships find better ways to communicate through both the hard and hilarious parts of life. So grateful for these conversations!

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    MZKelly1107
    United States4 months ago
  • Thank You

    Thank you to ALL your amazing comments and reviews, we feel so grateful to be able to help couples globally learn the skills necessary to thrive in relationships. We know from our own experience that building emotional safety during difficult times is extreme difficult and we are here to support you the whole way

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Relationship Renovation Tarah
    United States8 months ago
  • Hopeful, encouraging, relatable!!

    Thank you both. I found your podcast a month ago at a very dark time in our relationship. I was so lost, confused and hurting. This has given me tools, helpful insights and hope for a better future with my wife of 23 years. We are still working to rebuild, together. A light in the darkness. Keep up the great work! You are helping us find a way.

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Better husband 2.0
    United States8 months ago

Listeners Say

Key themes from listener reviews, highlighting what works and what could be improved about the show.

Listeners describe the tone as kind, hopeful, and reassuring, especially during difficult periods in a relationship.
Listeners value the hosts' candid personal examples, which make relationship guidance feel relatable and trustworthy.
Some listeners appreciate concise, well-organized conversations that combine useful information with an approachable style.
Reviews often praise the practical communication tools and structured advice for handling conflict and rebuilding connection.
A few reviews express dissatisfaction with the hosts' relationship perspectives or vocal presentation.

Chart Rankings

How this podcast ranks in the Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube charts.

Talking Points

Recent interactions between the hosts and their guests.

Anxiety Isn't the Enemy: What Your Body Is Trying to Tell You
Q: What are some solutions to these categories of anxiety?
Cain outlines a four-part process: use sensory input to return to the body, use a grounding exercise if activation persists, build awareness of early physical warning signs, and gradually practice manageable discomfort in safe conditions.
Anxiety Isn't the Enemy: What Your Body Is Trying to Tell You
Q: What are the types of anxiety?
Cain describes nine types: thought, nervous system, chest, gut, endocrine, immune system, depressive, anger, and trauma anxiety. She says categorizing symptoms can help people investigate underlying causes and choose more targeted support.
The Desire Gap: Rebuilding Intimacy Without Pressure
Q: What's the initial piece of advice you give that couple?
Bralove recommends stopping the pursuit-and-retreat pattern, temporarily removing intercourse from the table, and rebuilding connection through affectionate touch without expectations.
The Desire Gap: Rebuilding Intimacy Without Pressure
Q: How common is it to have a couple deal with a discrepancy in desire for sex?
Bralove says every couple has some difference in desire, and that the size of the gap, rather than its mere existence, determines how much work may be needed.
Men Who Do the Work: Why Real Strength Begins With Looking Inward
Q: Is it wrong for men to view physical intimacy as a need? If it's not a need, how should I frame it? If it is, how do I communicate that fairly to my partner?
EJ recommends a broader conversation about individual needs, emotional intimacy, non-sexual affection, rejection, and disconnection, rather than reducing intimacy to physical needs or differences in libido.

Audience Metrics

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Frequently Asked Questions About This Podcast

What is This Podcast about and what kind of topics does it cover?

Married therapists Tarah and EJ Kerwin combine relationship science, couples-work experience, and candid accounts of their own marriage to explain why partners get stuck in recurring conflict and how they can reconnect. Their conversations focus on emotional safety, communication, trust, intimacy, stress, anxiety, and the family patterns that shape how people respond to one another. They translate these themes into practical tools, reflection prompts, and repair strategies, often using specific situations from their relationship to show how the ideas work in everyday life.

Episodes alternate between conversations led by the couple and interviews with specialists, including therapists and authors. The approach is distinctive for treating re... more

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How many episodes of this podcast are there?

this podcast launched 8 years ago and published 308 episodes to date. You can find more information about this podcast including rankings, audience demographics and engagement in our podcast database.

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What guests have appeared on this podcast?

Recent guests on this podcast include:

1. Nicole Cain
2. Brooke Bralove
3. EJ Kerwin
4. Dr. Lee Baucom
5. Dr. Ariana Sholes-Douglas
6. Arianna Sholes-Douglas
7. Dr. Dan Peters
8. Dr. Stan Tatkin

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