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Artwork for If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes

If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes

If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes
Stand-Up Comedy
Tiktok
Improv
Bitcoin
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Game Of Thrones
The Mask
Bruno Mars
Eating Metal
Snoopy
Kim Kardashian
Gender Reveals
Los Angeles
Formula One
Christian Horner
Roblox
Fortnite
Vegan Diet
Organ Consumption
Bikini Maid Service

Welcome to If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes, a podcast about navigating the cruelty chaos, and wonder of our terrifying world. Niki, John, LB— and our producer Jordo— try to find meaning and clarity one or twelve subjects at a time: from the menu at Cheesecake Factory to a human man dressed up as Snoopy tucking you into bed.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

PublishesWeeklyEpisodes164Founded3 years ago
Number of ListenersCategories
ImprovSociety & CultureComedy

Listen to this Podcast

Artwork for If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes

Latest Episodes

merritt is back and not a moment too soon, as Niki and John need as much help as they can get to navigate the death of Santa Claus, the return of the Burgermeister, David Carradine, other movies we should make in Fortnite, various Wills Smith, and th... more

With merritt aboard the International Space Station, John and Niki hold down the fort by talking about typesetting, sports jokes I didn't understand, the #1 Maryland Food Podcast™, sad stories about old dogs, the lamp you jerk off, off-gassing, and d... more

Finally reunited after No Niki November, the gang wastes no time dissecting a new docket of topical issues facing today's youth, including Frank Sinatra, The Meat Zone, Michael's Milk, doorbells, crimeable acts, earbuds, blood vessels, battery-powere... more

John, merritt and Michael are still legally allowed access to microphones (for now), and thus the show continues unabated, despite his best efforts. This week's topics of discussion include Uncrustables, an important clarification regarding Michael's... more

Key Facts

Accepts Sponsors
Contact Information
Podcast Host
Number of Listeners
Find out how many people listen to this podcast per episode and each month.

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People also subscribe to these shows.

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Recent Guests

LB Hunktears
A very special guest and the hosts' fourth best friend
Episode: The Knife Man Commeth
Michael P. Higham
Celebrity guest and shoulder massager
Episode: Where's Vatican 2?
Michael Higham
Tech reviews editor at ign.com and a fan of the podcast
Imagine Games Network
Episode: Your Own Piss on Your Own Terms

Hosts

Merritt Kay
Host contributing humorous commentary, showing a deep affinity for absurdity and whimsy in discussions.
John Warren
Co-host and comedic guide, known for delivering engaging commentary with a playful and absurd twist.
Niki Grayson
Co-host and comedic guide with a flair for light-hearted banter, providing insight into various cultural and societal themes.

Reviews

4.9 out of 5 stars from 211 ratings
  • good pod

    you should listen to it because it’s funny

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Ben10282739301
    United States2 months ago
  • If Jenga Were a Podcast

    I closed my eyes and started at the very beginning after being a buzz buzz VGBees listener. Video games good but silly friends giving guidance on how to shut your peepers and navigate under that wet ball in the sky also good. Five star.

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Talamat
    United States3 months ago
  • It’s good

    I’ve never seen Ted lasso but I bet that guy ate it like groceries

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    JessJeverage
    Canada7 months ago
  • Best company a guy could ask for. Golf in our ears and comedy out there not like

    LI am proud to say that I go way over the top to stay dedicated to the bit whenever there is funny to uncover. Does this make me “weird” sometimes? Yes. Does it make me hard to follow in conversation as I try to find the peak of any particular joke? Also yes. But this podcast makes me feel less alone. It’s great to listen to hosts who understand the responsibility to find the funniest version of any joke worth telling.

    If my brain could be recorded, I think it would just be a replica of this s... more

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    b bd d jj i
    United States7 months ago
  • really good show

    there are a lot of shows where you can hear opinions. this is the best show for hearing facts, that are wrong

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    sleeptalky
    United States8 months ago

Listeners Say

Key themes from listener reviews, highlighting what works and what could be improved about the show.

The podcast has earned a reputation as a go-to source for comedic takes on everyday life, pop culture, and societal norms.
The podcast is lauded for its absurd yet insightful discussions, often prompting laughter and thoughtful reflection on contemporary issues.
Listeners praise the show for its humorous take on various topics, celebrating its ability to provide comedic relief and cultural commentary.
Listeners appreciate the light-hearted nature of conversations, making it a favorite for those looking for entertainment and humor.
Many express that the hosts have a strong dynamic, which enriches the listening experience and keeps them engaged.

Chart Rankings

How this podcast ranks in the Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube charts.

Apple Podcasts
#77
United States/Comedy/Improv
Apple Podcasts
#69
United Kingdom/Comedy/Improv
Apple Podcasts
#119
Canada/Comedy/Improv
Apple Podcasts
#145
Germany/Comedy/Improv
Apple Podcasts
#185
Australia/Comedy/Improv
Apple Podcasts
#194
Italy/Comedy/Improv

Talking Points

Recent interactions between the hosts and their guests.

Sorghum & The Famous Chicken
Q: In Mexico and other Latin American countries, which grain is sold popped like popcorn and mixed with sugar or honey?
The correct answer is amaranth, which is a staple in Mexican cuisine.
Sorghum & The Famous Chicken
Q: Which of these grains naturally contains gluten?
The correct answer is rye, which is the only one of the options that contains gluten.
Sorghum & The Famous Chicken
Q: Which of these grains is a source of complete protein?
The answer is quinoa, which contains all essential amino acids in a healthy balance.
Gimmick Month: Oops, Other People's Gimmicks
Q: Did you know Bug Hall had an interesting few years?
They discuss his controversies, including his conversion to Catholicism and social media troubles.
Gimmick Month: Oops, Other People's Gimmicks
Q: What is remixed from modern F If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes?
The theme for Gimmick Month is an annual tradition on the podcast where different topics are humorously dissected.

Audience Metrics

Listeners, social reach, demographics and more for this podcast.

Listeners per Episode
Gender Skew
Location
Interests
Professions
Age Range
Household Income
Social Media Reach

Frequently Asked Questions About If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes

What is If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes about and what kind of topics does it cover?

This podcast features a vibrant mix of humor and absurdity as hosts explore a wide range of topics, from pop culture and celebrity gossip to personal anecdotes and societal commentary. Each episode intertwines light-hearted banter with playful critiques and reflections on contemporary life, showcasing the whimsical and chaotic nature of their discussions. Listeners can expect to hear everything from nostalgic remembrances of childhood favorites to irreverent takes on faith and modern societal issues, all delivered with a comedic flair that resonates deeply in today's unpredictable world. What sets this podcast apart is its unique ability to blend sincere reflection with outrageous humor, creating an engaging experience that entertains while... more

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Which podcasts are similar to If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes?

These podcasts share a similar audience with If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes:

1. The VGBees Podcast
2. Side Story
3. Remap Radio
4. Voicemail Dump Truck
5. Fire Escape Cast

How many episodes of If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes are there?

If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes launched 3 years ago and published 164 episodes to date. You can find more information about this podcast including rankings, audience demographics and engagement in our podcast database.

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What guests have appeared on If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes?

Recent guests on If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes include:

1. LB Hunktears
2. Michael P. Higham
3. Michael Higham

To view more recent guests and their details, simply upgrade your Rephonic account. You'll also get access to a typical guest profile to help you decide if the show is worth pitching.

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