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Artwork for Modern Love
Love
Relationships
Marriage
Grief
Mental Health
Parenting
Divorce
Modern Love
New York Times
Friendship
Vulnerability
Money
Cancer
Family Relationships
Dating
Romance
Poetry
Communication
Modern Love Column
Motherhood

For more than 20 years, the Modern Love column has given New York Times readers a glimpse into the complicated love lives of real people. Since its start, the column has evolved into a TV show, three books and a podcast. Each week, host Anna Martin brings you stories and conversations about love in all its glorious permutations, dumb pitfalls and life-changing moments. New episodes every Wednesday... more

PublishesWeeklyEpisodes512Founded11 years ago
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Society & Culture

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Artwork for Modern Love

Latest Episodes

Janene Lin loathed the moment when the dinner bill would hit the table. When her date would pay, she felt like her love was for sale. Splitting the bill felt like no one had anything at stake. Most of the time, she would pay the bill herself, but tha... more

YouTube

One thing that comforted Denise Ryan after her divorce was that she and her ex-husband still talked every day. Even though they lived apart, they were still co-parenting their son, Alexander, and they were constantly jumping on the phone to tell each... more

YouTube

The actor Alan Cumming is not the man his father wanted him to be. Growing up, Cumming says, his father had specific ideas about how he should look and what he should do with his life, ideas he enforced with abusive violence. However, Cumming tried t... more

For most of her life, Kelly McWilliams has felt as though people aren’t seeing her clearly. Kelly is biracial, and she was raised to be proud of her identity: she grew up surrounded by African American culture and literature. But when she walks into ... more

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Recent Guests

Janene Lin
Writer and author of the essay “The Woman Who Always Paid for Dinner”
Episode: On Our Third Date, I Asked for a Joint Bank Account (Encore)
Denise Ryan
Writer of the Modern Love essay “Please Love My Son as I Do”
Episode: Does My Son Like His Stepmother More Than Me?
Alan Cumming
Scottish actor, cabaret performer and host of Club Cumming
Club Cumming
Episode: How Alan Cumming Escaped His Father and Became Himself
Kelly McWilliams
Author of the novel American Nightmare
Episode: I’m Black, Even if You Don’t See it
Taylor Tomlinson
Comedian and memoir author (Actually, Nevermind)
Self/Composer of Career
Episode: I Left My Fiancé, My Church and My Shame
Joe Swanberg
Director and filmmaker known for The Sun Never Sets and Easy
Filmmaker
Episode: I Was That Cliché Divorced Guy, and I Knew It
Carla Lalli
Chef and cookbook author
Food writer and chef
Episode: How to Feed Your Feelings After Divorce
Blake Martin
Psychologist; Modern Love essayist
Independent; author of a Modern Love essay
Episode: In 24 Hours, My Whole Life Changed
Jess Zakira Wise
Organizer and host of sex/ play parties
Independent organizer in California
Episode: Hosting an Orgy Is About More Than Just Sex

Host

Anna Martin
Host focusing on love stories and conversations; affiliated with The New York Times.

Reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars from 17.3k ratings
  • Miss the old format

    The interviewer style is prying and uncomfortable, digging over and over to try to have the guest saying things that they may not want to say. Sadly I will unsubscribe, the original podcast used to be so good.

    Apple Podcasts
    1
    moniliza
    United States8 days ago
  • Small suggestion please

    A parent’s systematic violence toward their young child (Alan Cumming interview) shouldn’t be referred to as a difficult “relationship.” That implies reciprocity. In the case of a kid small enough that the parent has near-total control over his/her well-being, the damage only goes in one direction. Mr Cumming’s nonviolent resistance of dressing & acting as his quirky young self, come what may, was so damned brave. I loved that.

    Apple Podcasts
    4
    verymary28
    United States9 days ago
  • Guests are annoying

    The inane drama, the upspeak….Where did the essays go?

    Apple Podcasts
    2
    Gsnikiti
    United States9 days ago
  • Podcast reset needed

    I have found myself skipping more and more episodes due to lack of interest. The last “interview” with Kelly McWilliams was insufferable. I made it through 10 min before throwing in the towel. Please bring back the essays!

    Apple Podcasts
    1
    Wordgyrl728
    United States23 days ago
  • Bring back the essays!!!!

    I understand that there must be an audience who enjoys this new format, otherwise they wouldn’t continue to make episodes this way, but in that case, can there be a second Modern Love podcast where it’s like the original? Just reading the essays from the column? There is something really powerful about hearing the essays without extra dialogue and conversation.

    Apple Podcasts
    1
    S687Njna
    United Statesa month ago

Listeners Say

Key themes from listener reviews, highlighting what works and what could be improved about the show.

Some reviews highlight strong production quality and insightful guest choices, while others crave the return of the essay-reading format.
Listeners appreciate the deep, personal storytelling and vulnerability of guests, though some critique the interview style as host-centric or interruptive.
Feedback consistently notes the host's interviewing style as a defining factor in listener satisfaction, with mixed opinions on energy and pacing.

Chart Rankings

How this podcast ranks in the Apple Podcasts, Spotify and YouTube charts.

Apple Podcasts
#69
United States/Society & Culture
Apple Podcasts
#79
Canada/Society & Culture
Apple Podcasts
#128
United Kingdom/Society & Culture
Apple Podcasts
#130
Australia/Society & Culture
Apple Podcasts
#245
France/Society & Culture
Apple Podcasts
#97
China/Top Podcasts

Talking Points

Recent interactions between the hosts and their guests.

I’m Black, Even if You Don’t See it
Q: Can you tell me about a specific date where race came up?
McWilliams recalls telling a date she was biracial, after which he threw water in her face. The experience made her cautious about dating and more determined to establish her identity early.
I’m Black, Even if You Don’t See it
Q: Tell me what you mean by feeling like a spy.
McWilliams says that, because people often perceived her as white, she moved through white spaces while privately observing attitudes toward Black people. In one cafe, she heard a couple speak disparagingly about Black Lives Matter protesters and chose to discuss what she had heard with her daughter rather than confront them.
How Alan Cumming Escaped His Father and Became Himself
Q: How do you identify, and why is that important to you?
Cumming identifies as bisexual because he is attracted to women and men, and wants people to understand that sexuality is not determined only by the relationships someone has had.
How Alan Cumming Escaped His Father and Became Himself
Q: Can you describe why your hair is so important to you?
Cumming says his abusive father controlled how his hair looked, including shearing it with sheep shears when he was a child. He later used changing his hair as a way to reclaim agency.
Does My Son Like His Stepmother More Than Me?
Q: What does family mean to you now?
Ryan says family can exist beyond the white-picket-fence ideal and take different shapes, including chosen family. She believes love can survive divorce.

Audience Metrics

Listeners, social reach, demographics and more for this podcast.

Listeners per Episode
Gender Skew
Location
Interests
Professions
Age Range
Household Income
Social Media Reach

Frequently Asked Questions About Modern Love

What is Modern Love about and what kind of topics does it cover?

The show centers on intimate, real-life stories and conversations about love, relationships, and the complexities of human connection. Across episodes, listeners hear personal narratives—from grief and family dynamics to non-traditional relationships, parenting, and sexuality—often anchored by expert or guest perspectives that illuminate societal norms and personal growth. The format blends memoir-like storytelling with probing interviews, producing both revealing personal stakes and broader reflections on love in modern life. Notable strengths include a diverse slate of guests and topics, a strong narrative throughline on vulnerability, and thoughtful exploration of love's joys and complications. Potential listeners who enjoy deeply human ... more

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Which podcasts are similar to Modern Love?

These podcasts share a similar audience with Modern Love:

1. Love Letters
2. This American Life
3. Dear Sugars
4. Death, Sex & Money
5. The Interview

How many episodes of Modern Love are there?

Modern Love launched 11 years ago and published 512 episodes to date. You can find more information about this podcast including rankings, audience demographics and engagement in our podcast database.

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What guests have appeared on Modern Love?

Recent guests on Modern Love include:

1. Janene Lin
2. Denise Ryan
3. Alan Cumming
4. Kelly McWilliams
5. Taylor Tomlinson
6. Joe Swanberg
7. Carla Lalli
8. Blake Martin

To view more recent guests and their details, simply upgrade your Rephonic account. You'll also get access to a typical guest profile to help you decide if the show is worth pitching.

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