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Artwork for Love in a F*cked Up World

Love in a F*cked Up World

Dean Spade
Relationships
Mutual Aid
Feedback
Abolition
Queer Liberation
Conflict Resolution
Transformative Justice
Crush
Jealousy
Love In a Fcked Up World
Community Organizing
Astrology
Politics
Solidarity
Feminism
Community Engagement
Emotion Regulation
Nonviolence
Resistance Movements
Confidentiality

Why do so many of us act our worst in relationships? How can we hold on to our liberatory values even when strong feelings are involved? For 25 years, Dean Spade has been working in movements for queer and trans liberation and to end police, prisons, immigration enforcement, and war. In his new podcast, Love in a F*cked Up World, Dean and his guests offer concrete tools for building and sustaining... more

PublishesTwice monthlyEpisodes30Foundeda year ago
Number of ListenersCategories
RelationshipsSociety & Culture

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Artwork for Love in a F*cked Up World

Latest Episodes

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To kick off Season 2, Jessica Lanyadoo is back to answer more listener questions with Dean. In this episode, they respond to questions about confidentiality, self care, and building and maintaining community when friends couple off... more

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Prisons are designed to isolate, break social ties, and destroy communities. Yet, people fight hard to keep relationships going across prison walls, and through all the crises that prisons manufacture. Episode 26 is Part One of a m... more

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Morgan Bassichis is back talking gossip with Dean. Why is it so hard to tell people things directly? Why is it so hard to keep things confidential? How can we tell whether we’re sharing information because it is useful for caring, ... more

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Tea kettle studies non-expert Morgan Bassichis is back with Dean to talk about resentment—how it can poison our enjoyment of the things we want and need to do, how it can be toxic for groups, how it is a reasonable response to the ... more

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Recent Guests

Jessica Lanyadoo
Astrologer, host of Ghost of a Podcast
Ghost of a Podcast
Episode: AMA with Jessica Lanyadoo on Confidentiality, Self Care, and Maintaining Friendships
Morgan Bassichis
Guest on the episode, discussed gossip and communication in communities
Episode: Gossip
Vicky Osterweil
Author and scholar; author of In Defense of Looting and Extended Universe
Author/Scholar
Episode: Vicky Osterweil
Eli Clare
Disability justice advocate and writer
Episode: Eli Clare
Benji Hart
Facilitator, educator, writer, and artist involved in multiracial abolitionist organizing
Patreon: benjihart
Episode: Benji Hart
Andrea Ritchie
A black lesbian immigrant survivor who has spent three decades documenting and advocating for the rights of marginalized communities.
Episode: Andrea Ritchie
Chani Nicholas
Feminist astrologer, author of 'You Were Born for This'
Episode: Chani Nicholas
Peter Gelderloos
Writer and activist with significant contributions to anarchist and radical thought
Episode: Peter Gelderloos
Holly Whitaker
Author of Quit Like a Woman and founder of Tempest, a trauma-informed recovery program.
Tempest
Episode: Holly Whitaker

Host

Dean Spade
Host of Love in a F*cked Up World; author and organizer; central figure guiding conversations on relationships within movements.

Reviews

5.0 out of 5 stars from 232 ratings
  • So helpful!

    This show helps me work through emotional and interpersonal problems without being too selef help y

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    22! D bd
    United States2 months ago
  • Woooo!

    Thank you for this!

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    basically rose nylund
    United States5 months ago
  • Super love love this conversation! Yall are amazing! Thank you :))))

    Podcast Addict
    5
    dreamlucid88
    6 months ago
  • Great convos

    Really enjoying the interviews and tidbits of the book. I still need to read it but in the meantime it’s very engaging to listen to the podcast. I’m learning a lot!

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    Acer Maple
    United Statesa year ago
  • Medicine for these Times

    Don’t skip this podcast if you’re interested in the personal as political! Dean is freeing us from so many lies of domination within sex, romance, and community spaces. Truly healing and revolutionary!

    Apple Podcasts
    5
    soularbear
    United Statesa year ago

Listeners Say

Key themes from listener reviews, highlighting what works and what could be improved about the show.

Listeners praise accessible, healing-focused take on relationships and politics.
Guests praised for bringing lived experience and actionable insights.
Hosts praised for warmth, expertise, and nuanced discussions.

Chart Rankings

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Talking Points

Recent interactions between the hosts and their guests.

AMA with Jessica Lanyadoo on Confidentiality, Self Care, and Maintaining Friendships
Q: What self-care practices help maintain boundaries and mental health in intense community work?
Gardening, time in nature, and group activities that foster privacy and a sense of belonging were highlighted as nourishing, along with mindful routines like silent meditation and breathing exercises to stay centered.
AMA with Jessica Lanyadoo on Confidentiality, Self Care, and Maintaining Friendships
Q: How should one handle gossip or “tea” about others in their network?
Shift the focus from sensational details to motivations and impacts, verify if sharing serves group cohesion, and consider who is being affected, with a preference for discussing concerns with the person involved first when safe.
AMA with Jessica Lanyadoo on Confidentiality, Self Care, and Maintaining Friendships
Q: What is the balance between sharing in community and protecting individuals' privacy?
The guests suggest cultivating conversations about ethics and boundaries in groups, asking before sharing, and distinguishing between matters of safety and personal drama, while recognizing that some information may need to remain confidential to preserve trust.
Gossip
Q: What are you looking for in a conversation when someone is venting at you?
Dean and Morgan discuss identifying whether venting is a confidential sharing moment or something that should be brought to the group with care, emphasizing the need to decide how to respond in a way that protects relationships and confidentiality.
Gossip
Q: Are you looking for my thoughts or are you looking for me to listen?
Morgan explains that sometimes the best approach is to clarify what the other person is seeking—whether they want feedback, or just a listening ear—so the interaction serves their needs rather than turning into unsolicited advice or judgment.

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Frequently Asked Questions About Love in a F*cked Up World

What is Love in a F*cked Up World about and what kind of topics does it cover?

The show centers on practical, relationship-minded approaches to social change, pairing activist analysis with intimate conversations about love, care, boundaries, and community resilience. Episodes explore how oppression, state violence, and capitalist pressures shape intimate life—from prison walls and mutual aid to burnout and boundary-setting—while offering concrete tools to sustain connection across distance, disagreement, and risk. A notable strength is translating complex political ideas into accessible relationship skills, often with guests who bring lived experience from abolitionist, feminist, and disability justice movements, plus writers and artists who illuminate culture, feedback, and healing in collective action.

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Which podcasts are similar to Love in a F*cked Up World?

These podcasts share a similar audience with Love in a F*cked Up World:

1. Becoming the People Podcast with Prentis Hemphill
2. Movement Memos
3. Death Panel
4. Gender Reveal
5. Ghost of a Podcast: Astrology & Advice with Jessica Lanyadoo

How many episodes of Love in a F*cked Up World are there?

Love in a F*cked Up World launched a year ago and published 30 episodes to date. You can find more information about this podcast including rankings, audience demographics and engagement in our podcast database.

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What guests have appeared on Love in a F*cked Up World?

Recent guests on Love in a F*cked Up World include:

1. Jessica Lanyadoo
2. Morgan Bassichis
3. Vicky Osterweil
4. Eli Clare
5. Benji Hart
6. Andrea Ritchie
7. Chani Nicholas
8. Peter Gelderloos

To view more recent guests and their details, simply upgrade your Rephonic account. You'll also get access to a typical guest profile to help you decide if the show is worth pitching.

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