标签之下,无人自由。我们需要时常留意,自己和孩子有没有被贴标签?这些标签会形成自我认知的催眠,让我们的人生只能沿着固定轨迹轮回,而错失更丰盛的人生体验。试着走出标签定义的人生轨迹,全然的活出任何面相,体验任何体验,都没有错。
我是如何面对自己脆弱的全能自恋呢?我学会用一句话安慰自己:苟且的活着吧,就算有一大堆的麻烦解决不了,我也配活着,不玩内的人生也不是一点滋味都没有,只要肯放过自己,承认自己的局限,不完美的人生也能过得有滋有味。
第三节课和第四节课讲的都是关系到拖延症的成音的。 如果你身边的亲人是程序化假自我的人,比如丈夫或孩子,该怎么办?答案是:你没有办法去改变别人,只有当一个人自己真正想要疗愈的时候,别人才可能帮助到他。
当我完全能够自我负责,不在期待别人改变,那么很多情况下,别人反而会自动改变。微博上一位网友提供了这样一个例子,她说:“当我期待老公改变,自己就能过的好一点的时候,只要有这个念头,他就坚决不变。但是,当我能跟自己的痛苦待在一起时为自己的痛苦负责时,不进我成长了,老公也随着我的成长而变化,他也在成长。所以,我明白了,如果我不能对自己负责,我也阻碍了老公的成长。”
某些家庭养育孩子的过程,其实就是不断阉割孩子自我功能的过程。所以我经常说:培养一个天才孩子特别简单,父母只要不自以为是的教育,守住界限,然后“坐享成果”就可以了。 女人的自我成长并不是为了取悦男人,也不是为了保全婚姻而委屈求全,而是为了让自己成为一个更加完整和自由的人。在生活中找回自己内在的中心,不被牵扯掉入各种陷阱,去享受、创造自己真正想要的人生体验。
如果有一个剧情让你屡屡中招,自己明明不想,却总是滑入固有模式,那意味着你内心深处有种渴望未被满足。一开始你也不知道该如何满足自己,这个时候,我们需要极富耐心的去倾听内心的渴望,用理性和智慧去创造满足,缔造新的脑神经回路。
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Apple Podcasts | #138 | Hong Kong/Kids & Family/Education for Kids |
Apple Podcasts | #157 | China/Kids & Family/Education for Kids |
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走出剧情|跳出轮回|活在人生的真相里 launched 3 years ago and published 34 episodes to date. You can find more information about this podcast including rankings, audience demographics and engagement in our podcast database.
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